i didnt look back

So at the end of high school we were laying together in bed
 and i told her i loved her, but it was time she made a decision,
him or me.
she became stiff.
my eyes i followed her to the edge of the bed
where she sat in her cute purple panties for a while.
Silence.
she grabbed her bra and shirt and threw me mine.
Silence.
i pulled on my shirt, along with my jeans and boots.
i hugged her and kissed her rosy cheeks.
i grabbed her little face.
her pale skin was cold in my hands.
tears were building behind the eyes i had been staring into for the past 2 years.
she shook her head no. but no to what?
"I love you, but he will always be first....."
I let her face go silently.
i imagined her face falling and breaking like a mirror along with my heart.
i walked out of the bedroom and grabbed my jacket off the counter.
 i fidget with the lock on the door.
I could see her shadow in the dimmed doorway light as i opened the front door.
The cold wind choked me with my tears,
 i stopped a second, and i didn't look back.